COME HOME, LITTLE DOGGIE By Lucillus Dedicated to Dog (Sung to the tune of "Autumn to May") Oh, once I knew a little dog, As scrawny as could be He got so drunk that late one night He joined poor Anglesea. And every day we hear the yell: "Swordbrother, come to me!" Now where, oh, where, has doggie gone? Where could that deadbeat be? Yell, Hendrick, yell! Call your doggie home! Well, once we lost him in the straw In KinderFodder camp They would not let us leave that night Said: "Don't forget that scamp. The one you buried in the straw And hoped we would not see For we have problems of our own We don't need Anglesea's." Hide, doggie, hide! Drag your carcass home! But worst of all he does corrupt So many younger boys A thirteen year old got drunk one night And Finn said: "What's that noise? You stupid Dog! What have you done? Go take him home right now! For if he stays we will get blamed And I will tell them how!" Run, Doggie, run! Take that poor boy home! And late one night he was convinced The trees were closing in He grabbed poor Ursus by the shirt And went along with him. He begged: "Please don't leave me alone! Stay with me all night!" The minute Ursus turned his head Dog was gone from sight. Hide, Doggie, Hide! I hope the trees get you! You know that Doggie thinks that he Is liked by one and all He'll say just what you want to hear And come at right your call. Unless, of course, his kinsman shouts Then he's nowhere to be found And soon as Hendrick leaves the camp You'll soon see him around. Why, Doggie, why? Can't you stay at home?