. .:::::. .::::::::. ...:::::::::.. :::::::::::: ..:::::::::::::::::.. ::::: :::: .::: ::::::: :::. :::::. : :: ::::: :: :::::::. : ::: : :::::::::. ::: :::::::: ::: ::::: ::::: : :::: ::::: oxic :::......:::: hock .:::::::. ::::::::::: ::::::::::: ::::::::: presents My Mind by Bloody Afterbirth Toxic File #19 *&^%$#@!@#$%^&*&^%$#@!@#$%^&*&^%$#@!@#$%^&*&^%$#@!@#$%^&*&^%$#@!@#$%^&* This file is a little, ah, 'different' from the others we've been doing. Basically its an experiment, I wanted to see what I could do with a file of this nature.. It's a little a weird, but what the hell... !@#$%^&*&^%$#@!@#$%^&*&^%$#@!@#$%^&*&^%$#@!@#$%^&*&^%$#@!@#$%^&*&^%$#@! sweat. i am drenched. cold. so cold. the window is open. wind blows in. beads of sweat freeze on my flesh. i shake. shadowy figures move around me. i cannot see them. my eyes do not move. i stare straight ahead. the wall is my friend. laughter. i hear they cruel laughter. they do not like me. or maybe they will like me very much. i try to rise. my body does not move. it does not obey my mind. my mind. where is my mind? i have lost my mind. colors. for the first time i see a color. red. it spins in front of my eyes. black pulsating spots join the spinning globe of red. more laughter. smell of rotting flesh. i see my breath. i try to focus. my eyes move finally. i watch my breath as it goes away from my body. an omen? i do not know. i breath more. i force myself to take a deep slow breath. my body begins to listen to my mind. but where is my mind? i am floating. i thought i was above my body since i was above my bed. i look below and my body is not there. i am my body. but where is my mind? i float to the cieling. it is warmer here. the sweat melts and is replaced by more sweat. i tremble, i think. how can i think if i don't know where my mind has gone? my body is spinning. just like the red in my eyes. i spin. around and around i spin. i come close to the walls. i am disoriented. suddenly i float towards the window. my feet go out. it is so very cold outside. the shadows flit about me. they poke me. they laugh at me. laugh at me. why do they laugh at me? i see that i am nude. where are my clothes? where is my mind? they speak gibberish. they make rude noises and brush against me. they pass through me. i am afraid. i am very afraid. i float upwards into the sky. my apartment is behind and below. i go up and up and up. i am still spinning. slowly. the wind blows around me. again my sweat is frozen. again i shake. i try to control myself. i want me to go down. down. i start to go down and back. my mind is in control again. but where is my mind? the thought costs me control. i lose control as i lose my mind. upwards into a blackness that rushes towards me like a wave. a wave of darkness. a wave of fear. a wave of cold. a wave of (c) 1989 Toxic Shock