THO #19




                    Harve & Marve:Statue of Liberty
                   =================================   By Exodus

        Once upon a time there were two goblins named Harve and
Marve.They usually thought of different things to get into and ways to
get into trouble.They live in a pile of hay in a big old barn in New
York City.
        One day when Marve returned from the store,he found Harve
incredibuly bored and needing to go have some fun."I'm so bored,I gotta
destroy something or demolish it",yelled Harve."Well,the World Trade
Center has already been destroyed,you have any ideas?",asked Marve."I
know,let's destroy the Statue of Liberty",said Harve."Good idea",replied
Marve,"I've always wanted to see her change her expression"."You ask me
I think she's a little too serious",said Marve.
        After they agreed that they were gonna destroy the Statue of
Liberty,they set out on their way.It was like a sauna outside,in the
middle of the summer,and Harve's armpits were starting to show and smell
how hot he actually felt."Don't you ever use any deodorant?",asked
Marve."Whats deodorant?",questioned Harve."Oh don't worry something too
intelligent for you to figure out",said Marve.
        After they had walked about 300 blocks(their barn was located on
the outskirts of New York City),they saw a beautiful woman in a
bikini.She was just simply laying on the sidewalk getting a suntan.
        "WOW,check her out!",said Harve."Watch this I know all the
pickup lines",bragged Marve.He quickly walked over to the stunning young
girl barely wearing anything."Nice clothes ya got there",faltered
Marve.He was getting incredibuly nervous around her,and could barely
speak.The girl slowly opened her eyes and looked at Marve full in the
face."You like 'em eh?,I'm trying to get a date tonight,I would have
worn nothing but the city won't allow it",she said.
        Thinking quickly,Marve thought of the one line that works
everytime,has never let him down yet.He immediately popped the
question..."By the way,is your tampon made in Korea",he confidently
asked.He knew at this point he had won her over,he could tell.
        "Korea?,I'm afraid not,but mine is made in Taiwan!,they are made
of better material",she said."Hey your kinda charming and cute,wanna go
out for a date tonight?",she asked."I'd love to,what's your
name?",asked Marve."Oh my name is Dovetail Swanbreath",she
stated."Hmmm,just kind of rolls off my tongue,I love it!","My
name is Marve,just plain old Marve",he said."Hmmmmm,your not related
to Dove Falconhand are you?,asked Marve."Never heard of her",said
Dovetail."Oh just curious",replied Marve.
        After Marve had introduced Harve and Dovetail,they were off
walking again.When they had walked for five hours,Dovetail asked,"By the
way where are we going?",she asked."Oh just to destroy the Statue of
Liberty",answered Marve."Cool sounds like fun,I just wished I was
dressed for the occasion",said Dovetail."Don't worry you look fine",said
Marve.He gave Harve a quick wink.
        Harve was getting bored again,real quickly now.He did keep
looking at Dovetail's thong but after a while it just wasn't enough."Say
does your douche leek?",he asked Dovetail."Sometimes,yes",replied
Dovetail."Okay guys,here's a good one for you",said Marve."Pretend you
are in a huge cavern with a 30 foot long sword and a 100 monsters are
going to attack you,what will you do?",Marve asked."Why eat a piece of
lettuce,that's obvious",said Harve."You guys are SO charming,I love
being with you",said Dovetail.
        Two hours latter they were almost there."You know I'm getting
quite hungry",said Harve."Me too",agreed Marve.Marve and Harve checked
their wallets,while Dovetail looked between her breasts."Nope",they said
at the same time,"No damn money!".
        "Watch this",said Marve.He quickly moved into a crowd of
people.A few minutes later he emerged with a big huge wallet."Hey you
shouldn't be stealing",said Dovetail."Stealing?,no way",said Marve."I
like to think of it as creative borrowing on a permanent basis",he
said."Oh than that's okay",said Dovetail,"As long as your not stealing
anything".
        It took them about 30 minutes to find a place to eat.They then
located a small fast-food joint called Rat-Express.The group ordered
their rat burgers and then proceded to sit down and eat their rat meat.
        "Hmmm,just curious,does anyone know someone called Donald
Trump?",asked Marve."Never heard of him",said Dovetail."Why?",she
asked."Oh cause that's the name of the person's wallet I borrowed",said
Marve."Well,since you borrowed it,you can always return it when we are
done using it",said Dovetail."Sure",said Marve.
        "Ugg!,I am so HOT in this weather",said Dovetail."I wish I could
walk around naked,then I wouldn't feel so miserable",shouted Dovetail."I
wish you could too",said Harve."Here",she said taking Marve's hand,"Feel
me!",she them plunged his hand down her top."How do I feel?",she
asked."Oh,hmmmmm,may take me a while to figure this one out",grinned
Marve.After 2 hours....."Yep you definately feel hot alright",smiled
Marve."Well then try this!",she then plunged his hand down into her
bikini bottoms.After 4 hours....."Yep,your still hot,you gotta cool
off",said Marve."I know tell me about it",said Dovetail.
        "Hmmm,I smell seafood!",said Harve."What?!?,can't you tell were
eating rat burgers",said Marve."Yeah,but I smell seafood,oh
nevermind",said Harve.
        The remaining trip to the Statue didn't take long at
all.They were now at Liberty Island staring up at the Lady
herself."Wow,quite impressive",said Dovetail."Yeah,but I can't see up
her dress from here",said Harve."Don't worry when were done I'll wear a
dress and let you look up it as long as you want",said Dovetail."Come
on,then let's get this over with",said Harve."Calm your
hormones,man",said Marve."So how are we going to blow it up?",asked
Dovetail."With this",said Marve,quickly pulling out a 10 foot long piece
of dynamite from his pants."DON'T even start!",Marve said to Harve,as if
he knew what Harve was going to make a comment about.
        "Well now?,where are we gonna put it?,asked Harve."Watch and
learn",said Marve.He then walked over and tickled the Statue's foot.She
immediately started laughing."Now!",yelled Marve.Harve threw the
dynamite stick into the Statue's mouth."How are we going to light
it?",asked Dovetail."Lightening,we do a raindance",replied Marve.
They then all did a raindance,and before they knew it a lightening bolt
hit the dynamite and exploded Lady Liberty to kingdom
come."Yeah!!!",they all yelled.
        The remainder of the day was spent walking home to their
haystack.After which Harve had spent 7 hours of looking up Dovetail's
dress.............