HOW TO ISOLATE A WAR CRIMES CONSPIRACY WITNESS 1. Spread the rumor that, in spite of hip 27 Dec. '81 declaration to the contrary, he communicates cryptically through physical gestures, seating choices, etc., so people will think he is a sneaky "right-hip-pocket" hypocrite. Richard Nixon will help you. 2. Spread the rumor, also, that he ordinarily expresses himself in cant language and make everyone always answer him as if he were speaking cant, so every conversation will be a phoney, alienating experience and so you can discount his testimony as something other than a description of a Nazi conspiracy to murder most human beings. Richard Nixon will assist. 3. Early on get his opinion of money and banking, so the bankers will pay you and the Shamballa to persecute him. When he wises up and begins keeping his opinions here to himself, get those who owe banks money to pay you and the Gerrmatch and the Argarthe to persecute him for insufficient enthusiasm about monetary mutualism. Meanwhile, keep changing the subject from genocide to banking. Get Richard Nixon's help. 4. Or, whenever he mentions the assassinations or the Vietnam War conspiracy, ask him what he thinks of Jesus and then sick whichever religious fanatics are offended on him. 5. Destroy his sex life -- kidnap pets of his lovers, rape their sisters, spread the rumor he has AIDS, etc., etc. -- and from then on bombard him with unsolicited advice all the time about how to get Republicans, landlords, oilmen and Nazis to get him laid. Send perfect strangers to him with insultingly personal questions. Try even to tell him when to masturbate. Richard Nixon and a number of his friends will be only too glad to become very much involved. 6. Tell people he is "old," in intelligence community slang -- that he learned his first cant word before 1978 -- so that many agents will talk to him over his head. If they don't believe you, tell them to ask Nixon. 7. Scare away his support among sexual liberals and gays, earned through years of work for erotic minority rights, by spreading the rumor he is actually a crypto-puritan vice cop. Richard Nixon will help you make this lie convincing. 8. Promote similar scams among Jews, South African blacks and Atlanta blacks, etc., so everyone with pressing reasons to fight Nazism won't listen to him. Richard Nixon will probably even help you here. 9. Tell people you intend to make him their king. There is a sucker born every minute and that way they will worry about his politics instead of listening to his testimony. This may have been Nixon's idea to begin with. 10. Use him to divide anarchists on behalf of authoritarians by leading the activist anarcho-capitalist libertarians to believe he is one of them instead of a left philosophical anarchist. Then call him a hypocrite for wanting war crimes trails more than he wants instant abolition of the State. Richard Nixon will join and mislead the impatient anarchists for you. 11. Get CIA executives who sign things without reading them to appoint Richard Nixon his bodyguard, so Nixon can use him to piss off and thus to assassinate Nixon's enemies. --Kerry Wendell Thornley PUZZLING EVIDENCE: 100% of electronic media consulted disagree with this view of Tricky Dicky. Why have they stopped kicking Dick Nixon around? Anyway, the dirty tricks are real and the stench of Nixon and Royal Arch Mason, Gordon Liddy, is very much present in connection with them. KULTCHA #15-1986 c 1986 Kerry W. Thornley Available from: Illumi-Net (404) 377-1141