DDDDD FFFFFFFFF SSSSSS D D FF S D D FFFFF S D D FF SSSSSS D D FF S DDDDD FFFF SSSSSSS (ASCii By AD!) Damned Fucking Shit Issue #33 Title: The Game Date: 6/7/94 By: Access Denied ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ The Game Dust flew across his face. He gazed out upon the dead world that he once called home. Looking across the horizon he saw a speck of light. His eyes ventured downward and he saw the skeletons lying at his feet. He kicked at the skull of one and it rolled into the deep chasm a few meters in front of him. Was this the world he once called home? It couldn't be. But in his heart he knew it was. He also knew that the terror that had befallen this world was created by one person. The skull rattled down the chasm. It made thumping noises as it bounced off the walls. Hours passed and the sound finally died away. The speck of light was bigger now. It was coming closer. Light encompassed him. It surrounded him like the life of something he once knew but had lost. It was him. He knew it to be true because it had told him so. Yet, he was afraid. This light wasn't alive, yet it was a living being. Fear overcame him and he ran. Ran for his life. It was too late. The light was him and they could never be separated. He then realized what he really was. He stood up. He journeyed across the destroyed landscape, wandering through piles of dust and bones. He was the light. The light was him. It had always been this way. In his wandering he came to many conclusions, all irrelevant. He saw even closer into himself. Darkness encompassed him and he wept. Not a tear for the world that he had destroyed, but a tear for the time he had wasted when he knew what he really was, that time being his entire life, everything before that, and everything after. So he had destroyed a world. What did he care? He knew what he was and now no one could stop him. No one ever could stop him. That was irony of the whole situation. He stopped his pitiful weeping. He lied down for an eternal slumber. He could afford it. Time was nothing to him. When he decided to wake up, everything would be the same. Of course he would fix it. That was part of the game. The game never ended. He was the game. No! It was too easy. Nothing was that easy. He wouldn't let it be that way. Why was this happening to him? He had done this forever. It was his little game. Why was it this easy? There had to be a catch somewhere. He wasn't so completely ignorant that he couldn't figure that out. He painfully realized that there was someone else. Someone more powerful. Someone who controlled him. But why would this someone let him know about the someone? It didn't work properly in his mind. It couldn't work this way. Sleep never arrived for him. In an instant he was up again. Damn this intolerable sunshine. That was it. He wasn't the light. It was so disgustingly obvious to him now. He wasn't the light! After all this time, he felt betrayed. Why wasn't he the light? It just didn't work out. The light was part of him. It always was. Always. It always appeared on the horizon after he finished his game. He didn't know why it was on the horizon. He took it as a given: After the game is played, the light is there. No questions asked. It was just a part of the game. But now he saw the light as it really was. Some sort of a higher being. But why did he know this? Wouldn't a higher being not let the lower ones know about itself? He would never let the lower ones know what he was, especially during the game. It was impossible. This light had to be stopped. It had made a mistake. It shouldn't have let him know. Now it would be destroyed. He faced the light. It was now next to him, as if summoned. Yes, it must be more powerful than he, it knew when to come. He gazed at it. It wasn't just light this time. All the times before it had been just been the light. Now it had shape. Nothing he could describe, but it had shape. How he cursed it, so obviously evil. One evil must always despise the other evil. Those were his rules. But this evil didn't hate. It was beyond hate. "Why do you appear to me now?" he addressed to it. The light came closer. "Why do you bother me? What have I done to you? You are the evil so I hate you." "Don't you know what I am?" it said in a quiet voice. "No I don't. I don't care. I don't have to care. This is my game. You don't exist. The rules do not allow it." "I exist." "You don't." "You still do not know who I am?" "If I knew, I would destroy you." "You shall now know. I am you. The game is over. We are one." it said in a tone that calmed him. Indeed the game was over. They joined. This was nothing new to him. It had happened every time before, and it had happened every time after. He was the supreme power and the game continued. 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