                    ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
                    ::::                               ::::                     ::::    T H E   O F F I C I A L     ::::                    ::::                                ::::                     ::::        G U I D E   T O         :::                     ::::                                ::::                     ::::    R E A L  G - P H I L E     ::::                     ::::                                ::::                    ::::         A U T H O R S          ::::                     ::::                           V1.0 :::                     ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::                         :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::                         ::                            ::                        ::       by                   ::                         ::                            ::                        ::      --] Man-Tooth [--     ::                         ::                           ::                         :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: 

 
 
          Through my vast experience of reading and collecting      G-philes, I have learned of manytopics depicted within files.      Just as well, I have been misguided by "fraudulent philes".      he authors of these files can be classified by at least one of      the following catagories...  
                    a: Needed to write a phile to attempt to please                       his favorie SysOp.                     b: Didn't have much if any actual experience with                      his topic.                     c: Needed to build a collection for trading.                     d: I just a plain geeky asshole.  
          Since we're not all geeky assholes who write fony philes,      this would just classify th minority.  The following compilation      focuses mainly on philes written by non-geeky assholes (i. just      geeks or assholes) in contrast to the elite group of unpronounced      "REAL G-PHILE AUTORS" (until now).  Let us now venture into the      heart of this file...shall we?  
     A Real G-Phile Author....  
                    - Uses 80 columns with lower case  
                    - Includes a title  
                    - Takes credit for his files by signing his name  
                    - Doesn't advertise a BBS unless it's his own  
                    - Doesn't waste disk space on a file written on a                         messag quality discovery  
                    - Doesn't plagarize from his friends' favorite                         books or ocal messages (without due credit)  
                    - Has a personality  
                    - Doesn't mind abusing the hell out of geeks  
                    - Uses abusive language when it's fucking                         appropriate!                      - Doesn't overuse abusive language to live up to                         this 'sell' file  
                    - Doesn't make spelling mistakes!  
                    - Researches the topic of interest  
                    - Explains the topic in depth                         (ie. makes his point well nderstood by                          the reader)  
                    - Idolizes the author of this model file  
                    - Makes full use of The World of ASCII Art  
                                 `'                                  |'                                /-\  <-- Bomb                                 ! !                                _\_/_        __                         =o"!`/    !-\_____ ||                          =   |  ___!_      | |                         =__/\______|=-----|_|  <-- Geek                          ''          `  
                    - Doesn't abuse The World of ASCII Art  
                    - Doesn't use ascii art if he obviously has                         an infinite ack of talent  
                    - Keeps his phile exclusive to a few select BBS's                         to incease its bartering power  
                    - Has already written numerous files  
                    - Makes use of CHR$(13) to increase the file's                         aestheticqualities  
                    - Doesn't use CHR$(13) to make the file longer  
                    - Doesn't advertise the hosting BBS in a file in                         hopes o increasing the file's lifespan  
                    - Personally tests his ideas  
                    - Writes philes even if he has been forgotten by                         most th BBS world  
                    - Always gives credit where credit is due  
          ...But since I already have enough enemies, I won't name the      those "writers" who inspred the making of this file.  
                                         --] Man-Tooth [-- 
 


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 & the Temple of the Screaming Electron   Jeff Hunter          510-935-5845
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